Sunday, October 24, 2004
Rave of the Day for October 24:
The Rave is baaack! Figured since I had such a crummy experience with the airline, I'd vent my dissatisfaction via this funny provided to me by Ducky....
Signs You Chose the Wrong Airline
"If there's a mechanical engineer on board, or even someone who's mechanically inclined, please report immediately to the cockpit."
Four states and a seatmate's life story later, you realize the plane is not on I-95 just to taxi to the runway.
The complimentary beverage is Zima laced with horse tranquilizer.
"...and a special welcome to the Association of Parents with Colicky Triplets!"
Relaxing music for take off is Buddy Holly's Greatest Hits.
Phish Air's complimentary bong hits are soured by overwhelming stench of patchouli oil, sweat and nine-year-old Birkenstocks.
The pilot for your trans-Atlantic crossing? Captain Nemo.
"And we'd like to welcome all our friends from the Islamic Jihad soccer team..."
"We only have one peanut, so just suck on it for a minute and then pass it back."
During her pre-flight demonstration, the flight attendant accidentally inflates her colostomy bag.
"In case of a water landing, that tubby guy in seat 19F will double as a flotation device."
After a flock of birds slams into your window, and during an attack of vertigo, you begin to think "North By Northwest Airlines" was a bad choice.
"Our in-flight movie this evening will be camcorder footage from my daughter Ashley's Little League game last night."
The pre-flight safety video shows a pair of lips, an ass, and the word "Goodbye" printed in twelve different languages.
Signs You Chose the Wrong Airline
"If there's a mechanical engineer on board, or even someone who's mechanically inclined, please report immediately to the cockpit."
Four states and a seatmate's life story later, you realize the plane is not on I-95 just to taxi to the runway.
The complimentary beverage is Zima laced with horse tranquilizer.
"...and a special welcome to the Association of Parents with Colicky Triplets!"
Relaxing music for take off is Buddy Holly's Greatest Hits.
Phish Air's complimentary bong hits are soured by overwhelming stench of patchouli oil, sweat and nine-year-old Birkenstocks.
The pilot for your trans-Atlantic crossing? Captain Nemo.
"And we'd like to welcome all our friends from the Islamic Jihad soccer team..."
"We only have one peanut, so just suck on it for a minute and then pass it back."
During her pre-flight demonstration, the flight attendant accidentally inflates her colostomy bag.
"In case of a water landing, that tubby guy in seat 19F will double as a flotation device."
After a flock of birds slams into your window, and during an attack of vertigo, you begin to think "North By Northwest Airlines" was a bad choice.
"Our in-flight movie this evening will be camcorder footage from my daughter Ashley's Little League game last night."
The pre-flight safety video shows a pair of lips, an ass, and the word "Goodbye" printed in twelve different languages.
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