Monday, March 20, 2006
Dreams and reality....
Last night, I dreamed that I was back at a local talk radio station, doing my old technical producer job. Problem is, I was still sick, and I hadn't worked there since 1994. So it more closely resembled a nightmare. The station hadn't upgraded their equipment very much, so I still knew how to use most of it, but my thinking was slow and so were my reflexes. You have to have split second timing in radio and never press an incorrect button. I was hitting buttons and then nothing would happen, or I wouldn't have the volume turned up, or I would forget which channel contained the network newsfeed I needed to air. I had talk show hosts coming in and throwing fits, I couldn't figure out the new call screening system, and I was getting sick off all the Coca-Cola I was drinking to keep me alert. I guess my subconscious has been thinking pretty seriously about what would happen if I tried to go back to work right now.
Watched Oprah's show today on poverty in the United States. It made me cry, because these people were talking about feeling invisible, and I can relate to that. There are 37 million Americans living below the poverty level. Over 60 percent of them are minorities. Yes, there are the stereotypes of drug addicts and young unwed mothers, but a surprising amount of people in poverty just had some shitty luck, like the death or serious illness of a spouse. Some of them had had their spouse leave them, and some had lost good jobs. Hell, that can happen to just about anyone. What's really scary, though, is that the majority of Americans are just two paychecks away from poverty.
The other reason that the show made me cry is that I could see how much these people needed help, and I knew unless they were really lucky, their situation probably wouldn't change. I miss having the luxury of donating to Habitat for Humanity. I am no longer well enough to volunteer at the local homeless shelters. And like the CNN reporter said, if Americans don't do something to help, who will? It made me sick to hear that right before Huricane Katrina hit, Amtrak volunteered to evacuate people in New Orleans, but someone from the mayor's office said they didn't need any assistance. Apparently they chose to ignore the disabled and those too poor to own a car with which to evacuate. No wonder those left behind felt as if they were invisible; they were being treated as though they really were.
Obviously, Dan's potential layoff has been on my mind. While there is a good chance he may able to keep his job in May, there is talk of another wave of layoffs in July, and he would almost certainly be axed then. So I can truly appreciate being on the brink of possible fanancial misfortune.
But on the other hand, I know Dan and I won't starve, even if we lose everything we own. That's the biggest difference between us and the people I saw on Oprah today: we could probably live in a relative's basement if things got really dire. I've never in my life gone hungry, even when I didn't have a roof of my own over my head. I've juggled bills, dodged creditors, wondered how I would pay the rent, even moved into my mom's house twice, but I've not missed a meal due to poverty. So I guess in a sense, my luck hasn't been that shitty after all.
We are more than two paychecks away from poverty. We have a bit in savings as well as some other funds we could dip into if necessary despite heavy penalties. And we would make a slight profit if we sold the house. I don't know if we would ever be able to buy another, but we might be able to swing rent in a cheaper state. Who knows? Perhaps Dan will get hired someplace before he is laid off, perhaps I will get approved for disability sooner rather than later, perhaps we will even be able to keep the house. You never know.
I wish I felt as optimistic about the 37 million in poverty.
Watched Oprah's show today on poverty in the United States. It made me cry, because these people were talking about feeling invisible, and I can relate to that. There are 37 million Americans living below the poverty level. Over 60 percent of them are minorities. Yes, there are the stereotypes of drug addicts and young unwed mothers, but a surprising amount of people in poverty just had some shitty luck, like the death or serious illness of a spouse. Some of them had had their spouse leave them, and some had lost good jobs. Hell, that can happen to just about anyone. What's really scary, though, is that the majority of Americans are just two paychecks away from poverty.
The other reason that the show made me cry is that I could see how much these people needed help, and I knew unless they were really lucky, their situation probably wouldn't change. I miss having the luxury of donating to Habitat for Humanity. I am no longer well enough to volunteer at the local homeless shelters. And like the CNN reporter said, if Americans don't do something to help, who will? It made me sick to hear that right before Huricane Katrina hit, Amtrak volunteered to evacuate people in New Orleans, but someone from the mayor's office said they didn't need any assistance. Apparently they chose to ignore the disabled and those too poor to own a car with which to evacuate. No wonder those left behind felt as if they were invisible; they were being treated as though they really were.
Obviously, Dan's potential layoff has been on my mind. While there is a good chance he may able to keep his job in May, there is talk of another wave of layoffs in July, and he would almost certainly be axed then. So I can truly appreciate being on the brink of possible fanancial misfortune.
But on the other hand, I know Dan and I won't starve, even if we lose everything we own. That's the biggest difference between us and the people I saw on Oprah today: we could probably live in a relative's basement if things got really dire. I've never in my life gone hungry, even when I didn't have a roof of my own over my head. I've juggled bills, dodged creditors, wondered how I would pay the rent, even moved into my mom's house twice, but I've not missed a meal due to poverty. So I guess in a sense, my luck hasn't been that shitty after all.
We are more than two paychecks away from poverty. We have a bit in savings as well as some other funds we could dip into if necessary despite heavy penalties. And we would make a slight profit if we sold the house. I don't know if we would ever be able to buy another, but we might be able to swing rent in a cheaper state. Who knows? Perhaps Dan will get hired someplace before he is laid off, perhaps I will get approved for disability sooner rather than later, perhaps we will even be able to keep the house. You never know.
I wish I felt as optimistic about the 37 million in poverty.
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