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Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Rave of the Day for March 27, 2006: 

Having MORE technical problems with the computer. Will probably have to have someone look at the tower drive. In the meantime, how about some tech support humor? This came from Joan about a year ago.....

HELP DESK LOG...

help desk: What kind of computer do you have?

Female customer: A white one...

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Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.

help desk: Have you tried pushing the button?

Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.

help desk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ...

Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry .

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help desk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left?

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help desk: Good day. How may I help you?

Male customer: Hello... I can't print.

help desk: Would you click on start for me and .

Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it!

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Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'.

I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

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Customer: I have problems printing in red...

help desk: Do you have a color printer?

Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.

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help desk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?

Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

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   help desk: And now hit F8.

Customer: It's not working.

help desk: What did you do, exactly?

Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening...

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Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

help desk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.

help desk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK

help desk: Did the keyboard come with you?

Customer: Yes

help desk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?

Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!

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help desk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.

Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

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A customer couldn't get on the internet.

help desk: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

help desk: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five stars.

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help desk: What antivirus program do you use?

Customer: Netscape.

help desk: That's not an antivirus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

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Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!

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help desk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you?

Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you.

Can you please tell me how long it will take before you can help me?

help desk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem?

Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago.

Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?

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help desk: How may I help you?

Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

help desk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

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