Saturday, June 03, 2006
I think we've made a terrible mistake.
It has been ages since my last entry, partly because I've been so damned busy and partly because Dan got mad at me for spending so much time blogging rather than using the computer for useful things like house hunting, finding new docs, etc. in Sioux Falls. At any rate, I could probably type for two days straight and not get to everything that has gone on the past few weeks, so I'll start with a summary and then elaborate as much as my sore hands and poor memory will allow. Will mention right here, though, that I've already collapsed from exhaustion and Dan is already having trouble with his new job, so we are not in a good place right now.
On to the review. Let's see:
1. Friday, May 20: went to going away party.
2. Don't remember what I did during the weekend or on Monday. Packing, probably.
3. Tuesday, May 23: met with the realtor.
4. Wednesday, May 24: went to the mountains.
5. Thursday, May 25: had a root canal.
6. Friday, May 26: Dan's parents arrived.
7. Saturday, May 27: packed storage units.
8. Sunday, May 28: re-arranged the house.
9. Monday, May 29: Dan left.
10. Tuesday, May 30: phone calls and errands.
11. Wednesday, May 31: sorted through what Dan left behind.
12. Thursday, June 1: Dan started new job.
13. Yesterday: Cleaning lady failed to show.
14. Today: breakdown.
The going away party was both fun and sad. Probably 20 of us showed up at a bar near our old job. None of the people who were recently laid off have another job to go to (although one is going to try running his own business). We ended up sitting in a non-smoking section, so I didn't suffer too much from second-hand smoke. I did go too long without eating, though; even though they did have a menu, there was nothing on it that was safe for me to eat. People were coming and going at different times and we were waiting for someone who never showed, so I stayed there longer than I was expecting to. And shhhh! Don't tell anyone, but I did partake of an alcoholic beverage. Just one, because more would interfere with my meds too much. Good thing tequila is gluten-free, heh heh. Anyway, it was great getting to talk with everyone, but it sucked having to say goodbye because I know I won't see them ever again. We did exchange e-mail addresses, but that won't quite be the same. And I won't be making as many friends after I move because I'll be house-bound a great deal of the time. That's the way things go, i suppose.
We met our new realtor on May 23rd. I like her. She's been doing this for 20 years, so she knows her way around, but she also is up on the latest technology, so we will be getting plenty of internet exposure (360 degree virtual tour available on three websites). She brought a CMA (comparative market analysis) with her so we could get a look at what our competition is and decide what a good asking price would be for the house. Unfortunately, there are 10 other house with floor plans identical to ours for sale right now in our own neighborhood, and some of these have been foreclosed upon, so they can be bought for a song. Also, among houses idential to ours that have sold in the past six months, most have had to drop their price, and two took as long as nine months to sell! Ack! So in order for ours to have any hope of selling, we have to start with an asking price about $20,000 below what the house is worth! That's about $5000 less than the tax assessment of it. And we need to be willing to drop it another $5000 if necessary. I was hoping we'd be able to make enough profit from the sale to pay off our credit cards, but it doesn't look like that's gonna happen. The worst part, though, is that it could take as long as four to six MONTHS to sell the house!! I was soooo not prepared for that. I have no idea how I'm going to be able to keep up with maintenance on it that long. Or how I'm going to be able to take care of myself, let alone Chip, for that long. I wish we had the time to replace some flooring, completely repaint, etc., but that would significantly delay getting the house on the market, and I need it sold ASAP. However, I face the possibility of it not selling at all if I don't make some cosmetic fixes, so I am taking the time to do that much and am hoping like crazy that it pays off.
Dan and I decided we'd better take a day off together while we still had the chance, so after Dan helped move our spare bed over to our next door neighbor's house, he and I jumped in the car and drove to the mountains. It's pretty sad that I live just two hours from Rocky Mountain National Park but cannot drive myself that far, so that's where I asked Dan to take me. We had to take a small detour to Boulder on the way because that's a really long time to sit in the car, but we made it up there about 2pm. I had my digital camera with me. I could have gotten better animal pix with my film camera (they take faster photos, but I knew I wouldn't have the time or energy to get the film developed, so I made do with the digital. Actually, it didn't turn out too badly. There were elk grazing just inside the border of the park, and the weather was quite cooperative (none of the usual afternoon rain showers). Dan obliged me by stopping at every single roadside pull-off so I could document the scenery. Probably not terribly exciting for him, but he knows it's one of my fave things in the world. It was a bummer that I didn't feel well enough to go on any of the hiking trails; I really miss that. But I did far more walking than usual just getting out of the car at each stop and photographing whatever could be seen from, say, within 250 feet. There were some occasions where I was too wiped out to get out of the car, and then Dan would take photos for me. He's pretty good. We saw a fair amount of wildlife besides the elk including chipmunks, marmots, ground squirrels, magpies, blue jays, Clark's nutcrackers (a type of bird). We even saw two beavers! I also heard frogs and hummingbirds. I was hoping for a glimpse of Rocky Mountain bighorn sheep, but no such luck. The scenery was astounding: still enough snow to cover the peaks (in fact, it was higher than the car in some places), but not so much to close the road. They had managed to plow all the way through just a few weeks before. Impressive at an elevation of 12,000 feet. Anyway, I took up so much time taking pix that we didn't have time to get through the whole park, so we just turned around at the summit and came back down so we could see more elk before sunset (right before sunset is when they're most active). We really lucked out with that because most of the other visitors had already left, so we had nearly unobstructed views of the elk. We got some pretty decent shots of does crossing the road, so I was happy about that. Even though I was exhausted to the bone, I had a good enough time to somewhat make up for that chaos that followed.
Had to return to the real world the next day. The main item on the agenda for me was a root canal. Have to admit that going to an endodontist was an excellent idea because it only took an hour. The regular dentist usually takes twice that long. They used nitrous oxide, which got me relaxed faster, but also made me nauseous. At one point, they had to stop working because I was sure I was gonna hurl. They eased up on the gas some, and I got better enough for them to continue. I was quite relieved when they were finished, thinking myself finally free from dental work for awhile, but then they reminded me the filling on that tooth was only temporary and that I still needed to get a crown from my regular dentist! Ack! So now I have to be in the chair again for multiple hours on June 13th. And I will have to dig up more hundreds of dollars as I've maxxed my dental insurance for the year again. Why do I feel like an instrument of torture lately?
Friday, May 26 was extremely busy. Dan went and picked up some of his medical records while I waited for the appliance repair guy to fix the stove. Luckily, it was an easy and relatively cheap fix. Then I got to go to physical therapy while Dan took all the packed stuff from upstairs down into the garage. When I got back, we had some storage units delivered to the house. Shortly after that, Dan's parents arrived from South Dakota. Dan's mom started cleaning blinds and windows. I think I was still finishing up the de-cluttering. Dan's parents decided to stay at a motel. While part of me felt bad about that, part of me was relieved because the spare bedroom still needed some major work, and I was in no shape to cook. After Dan's parents went back to the motel for the evening, Dan and I talked about how his final regular paycheck from the agency hadn't arrived in the mail. He called work and found out they had sent it to the foreman! So he arranged for a co-worker to bring it by the house the next day. While trying to figure out where his money was, I called my credit union's automated system to check deposits to our account. Was I ever surprised to discover a deposit for over $8000! I knew the agency didn't owe us that much, so I figured out it must be my Social Security backpay. I hadn't gotten a notice of award to confirm it, but I kept an eye on the mailbox, and sure enough, it arrived several days later. The only bummer was that I knew I didn't get to keep the money, that most of it I owed to my long term disability insurance company. Very surreal, knowing there was a great deal of money in my account but knowing it wasn't mine.
Last Saturday, Dan took the boxes I'd packed and put them into the storage units. I stayed in the garage most of the day to direct traffic and to pack up stuff we uncovered in the garage. Dan's parents cleaned blinds, windows and bathrooms. Our friend from work came by about 4pm with Dan's check and helped with the boxes. We only ended up filling two of the five units that had been delivered; you can actually fit a surprising amount of stuff in a 5x7x7 space. One thing that really sucked was that the units shifted a bit as they were filled (didn't help they were in our slanted driveway) and then wouldn't close properly. Our friend had to jack up one end with a 2x4 while Dan tried to line up the bolts in the door. When it was finally finished, we were all beyond exhausted. Dan's parents took Dan and I to dinner at the Outback. I had pork chops, which were difficult to eat on one side of my mouth (I'm not supposed to chew on my temporary crown). But they were delicious anyway.
On Sunday, we got a surprise at noon. I was expecting only my stepbrother and Dan's parents to show as everyone else had uncertain plans, but my dad and stepmother arrived too. And a bit later, my sister called and told me she and her husband had acquired a trailer to haul away my garage sale stuff! So I had eight people to help me out instead of the four I was expecting. I had originally just planned on having people remove the garage sale stuff from the house, but my stepbrother had some ideas on how to stage things to look better, so they ended up re-arranging four rooms. And they were able to move solid oak bookcases WITHOUT removing any books! And they even cleaned the floors behind the things that were moved, which I really appreciated. My stepbrother had suggestions for me for where to add more silk flowers and how to make the house smell good during a showing. Traditionally, people bake cookies to create that "homey" smell, but now you can get candles that smell like food! I have problems with the smoke from candles, but there's a way around that too. I ended up buying a candle warmer, which heats a jar candle from the bottom without lighting it. So I have a candle that makes my house smell like cinnamon rolls. Pretty cool, eh? I also arranged for a friend of my stepbrother's to clean the rest of the house on Friday. Sunday evening, Dan packed up the stuff he was taking to South Dakota and brought it downstairs so he could put it in his parents' SUV first thing next morning.
And first thing was right. I got up with him at 5:45 in the morning even though I was violently nauseous and so out of it I barely knew my own name. But I had to make sure he didn't forget anything and that I had all the keys to the house, the checkbook, etc. Also wanted to check on Chip because he had started limping the night before, not on his back legs like before, but his left front one, which was new. He was still limping, but the vet's office was closed for the holiday, and he was still able to put some weight on it, so I decided just to keep an eye on it. Went back to bed because I was really sick from being up so early. When I got up about three hours later, Chip seemed better, and by evening, he had completely stopped limping. Because of the holiday, I couldn't make any calls or run any errands, so I spent the day re-arranging. Dan hadn't been able to bring everything with him that he had wanted to, so the leftover stuff had to be put somewhere in a way that wouldn't cause too much clutter. Also, I had to re-distrbute the stuff in the closets to fill in the gaps left by what Dan took with him. I also found boxes of stuff Dan had either forgotten about or didn't know what to do with. So I started cleaning those out too.
On Tuesday, I had business to conduct. I called a company that restores hardwood floors without re-sanding them, hoping they could get me in quickly. But they were pretty backlogged. The earliest appointment I could get was June 12th! So much for getting the house on the market right away. But I think it is important to get the floors touched up as the sun fading in the dining area is pretty obvious. I also made a list of odd jobs that Dan didn't have time to do before he left and called up a handyman company to see how many of them they could do. Turns out they'll even waterproof my fence for me! Yay! And they'll be able to come out on the 8th. I also picked up meds for the pup at the vet and got more silk flowers at the craft shop. And I continued re-organizing the closets as well as tidying up the command center and washing stuff like the shower curtain cover, area rugs, the covers to Chip's dog beds, etc.
Wednesday, I went to aquacise even though I was exhausted. I also returned to the craft store as I had forgotten some items and went to the hardware store to replace the wire cutters Dan had packed away and to replace some plastic fasteners on the bed headboard. The old fasteners had broken, and the glass in one of the cabinets in the headboard had fallen out. I spent the rest of the day with phone calls, making flower arrangements, fixing the headboard and working on the various tidying projects.
Thursday, I got a massage (extremely necessary by this point) and had my annual mammogram. I don't care much for the mammograms as the fibromyalgia makes this procedure fairly painful, and I always have to have at least one of the scans repeated. Apparently, even though I'm only medium-sized, the tissue is fairly dense. At least they didn't find any new cysts this year, so I didn't require an ultrasound. That night, I took a break and watched the spelling bee! Yes, the annual national spelling bee was televised on ABC, live, for the very first time. Way cool! And much to my surprise, I saw someone I recognized! The man who was pronouncing the words for the kids to spell was none other than Jacques Bailey, the guy who took second place in the Colorado/Wyoming spelling bee the year I was in it! He went on to win the bee the following year AND won the national bee for good measure. He hasn't changed much....same feathered blond hair, geeky glasses, conservative tie. At least his voice is a whole lot deeper now, heh heh. Anyway, even though I now have trouble visualizing words in my head, I still did remember a few of them from the bees I was in, and I was even able to spell a couple of them correctly before they were shown on the screen. And I still do have a knack for figuring out how to spell something based on its language of origin. Yay! Those kids were brilliant! Gave me hope for the nation's future, that there are still some literate children amongst the millions who are not inclined to ever pick up a book. These days, when you think of a geek, you think of someone who knows how to fix a computer. But there are still some old-school geeks like me around, the ones who like to memorize the dictionary. And there was a big time girl power vibe going on. The top three finalists were female. Second place went to a Canadian (the contest is open to all primarily English-speaking areas), and the winner was Katharine Close from New Jersey. She correctly spelled "ursprache" for the win. I hope they continue to broadcast the bee every year. I concluded the evening by cleaning out the linen closet.
Also on Thursday, Dan started his new job. It was basically just orientation that day. He met something like 16 department heads, impressive until you find out that many of those departments consist of just one person, heh heh. There's probably 50 people working there total, pretty tiny compared to the 1800 people employed by the agency (which consisted of 4000 employees before the merger). He found out there's a 90 day probation period before he is eligible for benefits, which is really gonna mess with our budget because we'll have to shell out about $4000 in COBRA benefits in the interim! Ack! Also, there is NO dental coverage! They may be changing that soon, so we'll continue the COBRA on our dental until the new company starts coverage or until we exhaust the COBRA. The other stuff is pretty standard: one week vacation, four sick days a year, holidays off, an hour for lunch, regular business hours plus overtime if necessary.
Then yesterday, things began to unravel. First of all, the cleaning lady didn't show. I got up at 8am to be ready for her, and I felt sick as hell. Luckily, my neighbor friend came by about an hour later to walk Chip, so I didn't get up for nothing. But I didn't have a number to call to find out what happened, and when I called my stepbrother last night to see if he new what happened, I just got his voice mail. I need to get the house clean before the handyman guys show up on Thursday. They're gonna be patching up the scuffs on the walls, so I can't have a bunch of cobwebs everyplace. I can't very well put a dirty house on the market, either. Luckily, my neighbor friend offered to help me out when she can. Trouble is, she's transitioning to a new workplace and is on the job pretty much every day of the week. So I decided last night to see what I could clean on my own. I started with the master bathroom, which Dan's dad cleaned on Sunday, but I noticed there were still cobwebs on the walls. I decided right away I would just have to leave what I couldn't reach safely, like the window above the tub. There's no way someone with neuropathy and vertigo should be putting a ladder in the bathtub and scrubbing over her head. Even so, I was amazed to discover how dirty the bathroom had gotten in only five days and ended up re-doing a lot of stuff. After I scrubbed all the dirt off the bathroom door (which had apparently not been cleaned in a few years), the back spasms and carpal tunnel started up and never let up, even after a dinner break and a shower. Crap. I tried to gently vaccum the master bedroom closet as there was dog hair about an inch thick in there (weird because the dog never goes in there) and do just one load of laundry, and that about did me in. I ended up taking two Baclofen and 3mg of Lunesta so I could get a bit of sleep.
But if I thought my day was poopy, Dan's was even worse. His first real day of work was yesterday, and that didn't go well. First of all, they had failed to tell him that they sometimes use Multi-Ad Creator, a software he had never used before. They had him working on ads in that software, and no one offered to train him or give him any pointers. They just expected to figure it out by himself. Secondly, the office is all really bright fluorescent lighting, which gives him migraines. He got a headache within an hour of starting his shift to the point where he was vomiting and had to leave early. Not exactly a good first impression. So Dan is gonna try and see a doctor on Monday, which will mean he will miss work on only his second day. I'm not sure what kind of accommodations they would be able to make at his new job since all the computers are in a common area. I suggested he attach some black cardboard to the top of his monitor to block out the light, creating a kind of tunnel he could look through, which would look weird, but might help. Dan is frustrated, though, as he has been seeing doctors for years about his migraines with no real progress, and now he's in an area with fewer specialists. He's actually considering looking for another job already, one in a field where he wouldn't be forced to sit directly under a fluorescent light 40 hours a week. I don't know what to tell him.
Today, I've pretty much been useless. I got up at 9:30 to give Chip a potty break (we've removed the dog door again and so have to let him out via the sliding glass door) but could not stay alert at all. Fell back into bed, tried to get up several times but couldn't, talked to Dan in bed when he called me and finally dragged my ass up at 1pm. Did my stretches, but I can barely stand long enough to make myself a meal. This, my friends, is what's commonly known as a flare, and I think I'm in big trouble. Have been packing, cleaning, running errands, making phone calls, going to appointments, etc. pretty much every day for three weeks. And it has caught up with me. I'm stuck trying to sell the house in one of the worst markets in the US. I must be freakin' crazy to get myself in a mess like this.
Right now, I fear we really screwed up. I'm simply not well enough to handle a household by myself, and Dan may not be able to handle a routine office job if he can't figure out a way to quell those migraines. It may not be the end of the world, but I already miss the relatively non-chaotic life we had, even with Dan on the brink of layoff and me fighting for disability benefits. At least then Dan and I were together, which made it much easier to deal with.
Now what???
On to the review. Let's see:
1. Friday, May 20: went to going away party.
2. Don't remember what I did during the weekend or on Monday. Packing, probably.
3. Tuesday, May 23: met with the realtor.
4. Wednesday, May 24: went to the mountains.
5. Thursday, May 25: had a root canal.
6. Friday, May 26: Dan's parents arrived.
7. Saturday, May 27: packed storage units.
8. Sunday, May 28: re-arranged the house.
9. Monday, May 29: Dan left.
10. Tuesday, May 30: phone calls and errands.
11. Wednesday, May 31: sorted through what Dan left behind.
12. Thursday, June 1: Dan started new job.
13. Yesterday: Cleaning lady failed to show.
14. Today: breakdown.
The going away party was both fun and sad. Probably 20 of us showed up at a bar near our old job. None of the people who were recently laid off have another job to go to (although one is going to try running his own business). We ended up sitting in a non-smoking section, so I didn't suffer too much from second-hand smoke. I did go too long without eating, though; even though they did have a menu, there was nothing on it that was safe for me to eat. People were coming and going at different times and we were waiting for someone who never showed, so I stayed there longer than I was expecting to. And shhhh! Don't tell anyone, but I did partake of an alcoholic beverage. Just one, because more would interfere with my meds too much. Good thing tequila is gluten-free, heh heh. Anyway, it was great getting to talk with everyone, but it sucked having to say goodbye because I know I won't see them ever again. We did exchange e-mail addresses, but that won't quite be the same. And I won't be making as many friends after I move because I'll be house-bound a great deal of the time. That's the way things go, i suppose.
We met our new realtor on May 23rd. I like her. She's been doing this for 20 years, so she knows her way around, but she also is up on the latest technology, so we will be getting plenty of internet exposure (360 degree virtual tour available on three websites). She brought a CMA (comparative market analysis) with her so we could get a look at what our competition is and decide what a good asking price would be for the house. Unfortunately, there are 10 other house with floor plans identical to ours for sale right now in our own neighborhood, and some of these have been foreclosed upon, so they can be bought for a song. Also, among houses idential to ours that have sold in the past six months, most have had to drop their price, and two took as long as nine months to sell! Ack! So in order for ours to have any hope of selling, we have to start with an asking price about $20,000 below what the house is worth! That's about $5000 less than the tax assessment of it. And we need to be willing to drop it another $5000 if necessary. I was hoping we'd be able to make enough profit from the sale to pay off our credit cards, but it doesn't look like that's gonna happen. The worst part, though, is that it could take as long as four to six MONTHS to sell the house!! I was soooo not prepared for that. I have no idea how I'm going to be able to keep up with maintenance on it that long. Or how I'm going to be able to take care of myself, let alone Chip, for that long. I wish we had the time to replace some flooring, completely repaint, etc., but that would significantly delay getting the house on the market, and I need it sold ASAP. However, I face the possibility of it not selling at all if I don't make some cosmetic fixes, so I am taking the time to do that much and am hoping like crazy that it pays off.
Dan and I decided we'd better take a day off together while we still had the chance, so after Dan helped move our spare bed over to our next door neighbor's house, he and I jumped in the car and drove to the mountains. It's pretty sad that I live just two hours from Rocky Mountain National Park but cannot drive myself that far, so that's where I asked Dan to take me. We had to take a small detour to Boulder on the way because that's a really long time to sit in the car, but we made it up there about 2pm. I had my digital camera with me. I could have gotten better animal pix with my film camera (they take faster photos, but I knew I wouldn't have the time or energy to get the film developed, so I made do with the digital. Actually, it didn't turn out too badly. There were elk grazing just inside the border of the park, and the weather was quite cooperative (none of the usual afternoon rain showers). Dan obliged me by stopping at every single roadside pull-off so I could document the scenery. Probably not terribly exciting for him, but he knows it's one of my fave things in the world. It was a bummer that I didn't feel well enough to go on any of the hiking trails; I really miss that. But I did far more walking than usual just getting out of the car at each stop and photographing whatever could be seen from, say, within 250 feet. There were some occasions where I was too wiped out to get out of the car, and then Dan would take photos for me. He's pretty good. We saw a fair amount of wildlife besides the elk including chipmunks, marmots, ground squirrels, magpies, blue jays, Clark's nutcrackers (a type of bird). We even saw two beavers! I also heard frogs and hummingbirds. I was hoping for a glimpse of Rocky Mountain bighorn sheep, but no such luck. The scenery was astounding: still enough snow to cover the peaks (in fact, it was higher than the car in some places), but not so much to close the road. They had managed to plow all the way through just a few weeks before. Impressive at an elevation of 12,000 feet. Anyway, I took up so much time taking pix that we didn't have time to get through the whole park, so we just turned around at the summit and came back down so we could see more elk before sunset (right before sunset is when they're most active). We really lucked out with that because most of the other visitors had already left, so we had nearly unobstructed views of the elk. We got some pretty decent shots of does crossing the road, so I was happy about that. Even though I was exhausted to the bone, I had a good enough time to somewhat make up for that chaos that followed.
Had to return to the real world the next day. The main item on the agenda for me was a root canal. Have to admit that going to an endodontist was an excellent idea because it only took an hour. The regular dentist usually takes twice that long. They used nitrous oxide, which got me relaxed faster, but also made me nauseous. At one point, they had to stop working because I was sure I was gonna hurl. They eased up on the gas some, and I got better enough for them to continue. I was quite relieved when they were finished, thinking myself finally free from dental work for awhile, but then they reminded me the filling on that tooth was only temporary and that I still needed to get a crown from my regular dentist! Ack! So now I have to be in the chair again for multiple hours on June 13th. And I will have to dig up more hundreds of dollars as I've maxxed my dental insurance for the year again. Why do I feel like an instrument of torture lately?
Friday, May 26 was extremely busy. Dan went and picked up some of his medical records while I waited for the appliance repair guy to fix the stove. Luckily, it was an easy and relatively cheap fix. Then I got to go to physical therapy while Dan took all the packed stuff from upstairs down into the garage. When I got back, we had some storage units delivered to the house. Shortly after that, Dan's parents arrived from South Dakota. Dan's mom started cleaning blinds and windows. I think I was still finishing up the de-cluttering. Dan's parents decided to stay at a motel. While part of me felt bad about that, part of me was relieved because the spare bedroom still needed some major work, and I was in no shape to cook. After Dan's parents went back to the motel for the evening, Dan and I talked about how his final regular paycheck from the agency hadn't arrived in the mail. He called work and found out they had sent it to the foreman! So he arranged for a co-worker to bring it by the house the next day. While trying to figure out where his money was, I called my credit union's automated system to check deposits to our account. Was I ever surprised to discover a deposit for over $8000! I knew the agency didn't owe us that much, so I figured out it must be my Social Security backpay. I hadn't gotten a notice of award to confirm it, but I kept an eye on the mailbox, and sure enough, it arrived several days later. The only bummer was that I knew I didn't get to keep the money, that most of it I owed to my long term disability insurance company. Very surreal, knowing there was a great deal of money in my account but knowing it wasn't mine.
Last Saturday, Dan took the boxes I'd packed and put them into the storage units. I stayed in the garage most of the day to direct traffic and to pack up stuff we uncovered in the garage. Dan's parents cleaned blinds, windows and bathrooms. Our friend from work came by about 4pm with Dan's check and helped with the boxes. We only ended up filling two of the five units that had been delivered; you can actually fit a surprising amount of stuff in a 5x7x7 space. One thing that really sucked was that the units shifted a bit as they were filled (didn't help they were in our slanted driveway) and then wouldn't close properly. Our friend had to jack up one end with a 2x4 while Dan tried to line up the bolts in the door. When it was finally finished, we were all beyond exhausted. Dan's parents took Dan and I to dinner at the Outback. I had pork chops, which were difficult to eat on one side of my mouth (I'm not supposed to chew on my temporary crown). But they were delicious anyway.
On Sunday, we got a surprise at noon. I was expecting only my stepbrother and Dan's parents to show as everyone else had uncertain plans, but my dad and stepmother arrived too. And a bit later, my sister called and told me she and her husband had acquired a trailer to haul away my garage sale stuff! So I had eight people to help me out instead of the four I was expecting. I had originally just planned on having people remove the garage sale stuff from the house, but my stepbrother had some ideas on how to stage things to look better, so they ended up re-arranging four rooms. And they were able to move solid oak bookcases WITHOUT removing any books! And they even cleaned the floors behind the things that were moved, which I really appreciated. My stepbrother had suggestions for me for where to add more silk flowers and how to make the house smell good during a showing. Traditionally, people bake cookies to create that "homey" smell, but now you can get candles that smell like food! I have problems with the smoke from candles, but there's a way around that too. I ended up buying a candle warmer, which heats a jar candle from the bottom without lighting it. So I have a candle that makes my house smell like cinnamon rolls. Pretty cool, eh? I also arranged for a friend of my stepbrother's to clean the rest of the house on Friday. Sunday evening, Dan packed up the stuff he was taking to South Dakota and brought it downstairs so he could put it in his parents' SUV first thing next morning.
And first thing was right. I got up with him at 5:45 in the morning even though I was violently nauseous and so out of it I barely knew my own name. But I had to make sure he didn't forget anything and that I had all the keys to the house, the checkbook, etc. Also wanted to check on Chip because he had started limping the night before, not on his back legs like before, but his left front one, which was new. He was still limping, but the vet's office was closed for the holiday, and he was still able to put some weight on it, so I decided just to keep an eye on it. Went back to bed because I was really sick from being up so early. When I got up about three hours later, Chip seemed better, and by evening, he had completely stopped limping. Because of the holiday, I couldn't make any calls or run any errands, so I spent the day re-arranging. Dan hadn't been able to bring everything with him that he had wanted to, so the leftover stuff had to be put somewhere in a way that wouldn't cause too much clutter. Also, I had to re-distrbute the stuff in the closets to fill in the gaps left by what Dan took with him. I also found boxes of stuff Dan had either forgotten about or didn't know what to do with. So I started cleaning those out too.
On Tuesday, I had business to conduct. I called a company that restores hardwood floors without re-sanding them, hoping they could get me in quickly. But they were pretty backlogged. The earliest appointment I could get was June 12th! So much for getting the house on the market right away. But I think it is important to get the floors touched up as the sun fading in the dining area is pretty obvious. I also made a list of odd jobs that Dan didn't have time to do before he left and called up a handyman company to see how many of them they could do. Turns out they'll even waterproof my fence for me! Yay! And they'll be able to come out on the 8th. I also picked up meds for the pup at the vet and got more silk flowers at the craft shop. And I continued re-organizing the closets as well as tidying up the command center and washing stuff like the shower curtain cover, area rugs, the covers to Chip's dog beds, etc.
Wednesday, I went to aquacise even though I was exhausted. I also returned to the craft store as I had forgotten some items and went to the hardware store to replace the wire cutters Dan had packed away and to replace some plastic fasteners on the bed headboard. The old fasteners had broken, and the glass in one of the cabinets in the headboard had fallen out. I spent the rest of the day with phone calls, making flower arrangements, fixing the headboard and working on the various tidying projects.
Thursday, I got a massage (extremely necessary by this point) and had my annual mammogram. I don't care much for the mammograms as the fibromyalgia makes this procedure fairly painful, and I always have to have at least one of the scans repeated. Apparently, even though I'm only medium-sized, the tissue is fairly dense. At least they didn't find any new cysts this year, so I didn't require an ultrasound. That night, I took a break and watched the spelling bee! Yes, the annual national spelling bee was televised on ABC, live, for the very first time. Way cool! And much to my surprise, I saw someone I recognized! The man who was pronouncing the words for the kids to spell was none other than Jacques Bailey, the guy who took second place in the Colorado/Wyoming spelling bee the year I was in it! He went on to win the bee the following year AND won the national bee for good measure. He hasn't changed much....same feathered blond hair, geeky glasses, conservative tie. At least his voice is a whole lot deeper now, heh heh. Anyway, even though I now have trouble visualizing words in my head, I still did remember a few of them from the bees I was in, and I was even able to spell a couple of them correctly before they were shown on the screen. And I still do have a knack for figuring out how to spell something based on its language of origin. Yay! Those kids were brilliant! Gave me hope for the nation's future, that there are still some literate children amongst the millions who are not inclined to ever pick up a book. These days, when you think of a geek, you think of someone who knows how to fix a computer. But there are still some old-school geeks like me around, the ones who like to memorize the dictionary. And there was a big time girl power vibe going on. The top three finalists were female. Second place went to a Canadian (the contest is open to all primarily English-speaking areas), and the winner was Katharine Close from New Jersey. She correctly spelled "ursprache" for the win. I hope they continue to broadcast the bee every year. I concluded the evening by cleaning out the linen closet.
Also on Thursday, Dan started his new job. It was basically just orientation that day. He met something like 16 department heads, impressive until you find out that many of those departments consist of just one person, heh heh. There's probably 50 people working there total, pretty tiny compared to the 1800 people employed by the agency (which consisted of 4000 employees before the merger). He found out there's a 90 day probation period before he is eligible for benefits, which is really gonna mess with our budget because we'll have to shell out about $4000 in COBRA benefits in the interim! Ack! Also, there is NO dental coverage! They may be changing that soon, so we'll continue the COBRA on our dental until the new company starts coverage or until we exhaust the COBRA. The other stuff is pretty standard: one week vacation, four sick days a year, holidays off, an hour for lunch, regular business hours plus overtime if necessary.
Then yesterday, things began to unravel. First of all, the cleaning lady didn't show. I got up at 8am to be ready for her, and I felt sick as hell. Luckily, my neighbor friend came by about an hour later to walk Chip, so I didn't get up for nothing. But I didn't have a number to call to find out what happened, and when I called my stepbrother last night to see if he new what happened, I just got his voice mail. I need to get the house clean before the handyman guys show up on Thursday. They're gonna be patching up the scuffs on the walls, so I can't have a bunch of cobwebs everyplace. I can't very well put a dirty house on the market, either. Luckily, my neighbor friend offered to help me out when she can. Trouble is, she's transitioning to a new workplace and is on the job pretty much every day of the week. So I decided last night to see what I could clean on my own. I started with the master bathroom, which Dan's dad cleaned on Sunday, but I noticed there were still cobwebs on the walls. I decided right away I would just have to leave what I couldn't reach safely, like the window above the tub. There's no way someone with neuropathy and vertigo should be putting a ladder in the bathtub and scrubbing over her head. Even so, I was amazed to discover how dirty the bathroom had gotten in only five days and ended up re-doing a lot of stuff. After I scrubbed all the dirt off the bathroom door (which had apparently not been cleaned in a few years), the back spasms and carpal tunnel started up and never let up, even after a dinner break and a shower. Crap. I tried to gently vaccum the master bedroom closet as there was dog hair about an inch thick in there (weird because the dog never goes in there) and do just one load of laundry, and that about did me in. I ended up taking two Baclofen and 3mg of Lunesta so I could get a bit of sleep.
But if I thought my day was poopy, Dan's was even worse. His first real day of work was yesterday, and that didn't go well. First of all, they had failed to tell him that they sometimes use Multi-Ad Creator, a software he had never used before. They had him working on ads in that software, and no one offered to train him or give him any pointers. They just expected to figure it out by himself. Secondly, the office is all really bright fluorescent lighting, which gives him migraines. He got a headache within an hour of starting his shift to the point where he was vomiting and had to leave early. Not exactly a good first impression. So Dan is gonna try and see a doctor on Monday, which will mean he will miss work on only his second day. I'm not sure what kind of accommodations they would be able to make at his new job since all the computers are in a common area. I suggested he attach some black cardboard to the top of his monitor to block out the light, creating a kind of tunnel he could look through, which would look weird, but might help. Dan is frustrated, though, as he has been seeing doctors for years about his migraines with no real progress, and now he's in an area with fewer specialists. He's actually considering looking for another job already, one in a field where he wouldn't be forced to sit directly under a fluorescent light 40 hours a week. I don't know what to tell him.
Today, I've pretty much been useless. I got up at 9:30 to give Chip a potty break (we've removed the dog door again and so have to let him out via the sliding glass door) but could not stay alert at all. Fell back into bed, tried to get up several times but couldn't, talked to Dan in bed when he called me and finally dragged my ass up at 1pm. Did my stretches, but I can barely stand long enough to make myself a meal. This, my friends, is what's commonly known as a flare, and I think I'm in big trouble. Have been packing, cleaning, running errands, making phone calls, going to appointments, etc. pretty much every day for three weeks. And it has caught up with me. I'm stuck trying to sell the house in one of the worst markets in the US. I must be freakin' crazy to get myself in a mess like this.
Right now, I fear we really screwed up. I'm simply not well enough to handle a household by myself, and Dan may not be able to handle a routine office job if he can't figure out a way to quell those migraines. It may not be the end of the world, but I already miss the relatively non-chaotic life we had, even with Dan on the brink of layoff and me fighting for disability benefits. At least then Dan and I were together, which made it much easier to deal with.
Now what???
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