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Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Today's blog entry brought to you by the letter "zzzzzzz"..... 

Took the last prednisone tablet this morning. Hadn't slept well for various reasons. First it was the return of flapping feet and various other muscle spasms. Then it was the familiar pain in my hips, shoulders and aching in my hands. Then night sweats (but to be fair, I think the incredibly hot weather could be to blame this time, heh heh). And of course, Chip chose this morning to be whiny because he knew I was awake. I awoke at 7am but was unable to get out of bed for another two hours.

It is probably difficult to believe that someone can be so profoundly exhausted that it is physically painful to be awake, but that's where I am again. So I am back to dozing off whenever I sit still and relax for more than five minutes. In that respect, the course of prednisone was a complete failure. It's difficult to find the words to describe how utterly disappointing that is.

I'm not sure if the fibro fog is any less now than before. I am once again wandering into rooms and standing there with a blank expression, waiting to remember why I went there and many times going back to the room I was just in to see if that will trigger anything familiar. If I need to do two things, chances are I will remember only one of them. It seemed to take me forever this morning to get through all the rituals necessary to have the house ready for showing (opening blinds, putting dog beds in the closet, making sure there were adequate brochures available, etc.), not just because I hurt, but mostly because I had trouble thinking clearly enough to realize what these little tasks were.

Did make it to aquacise. The exercises were more difficult to do than on Monday, partly because of pain and partly because I was uncoordinated and had to picture an activity in my mind before I could actually do it. And the exhaustion threatened to squash me flat. But by far the most discouraging thing was that when I was getting out of the pool, I felt weakness in my legs returning.

Got home from the class with the intention of making lunch and then going to the health food store (I've tried three previous times but have been interrupted each time). Within minutes of finishing my rice spaghetti, I fell asleep on the couch for an hour and a half. I awoke early enough to still go before afternoon traffic got bad, though. I was grabbing my purse and about to take off when the phone rang. It was the realtor's office again, setting up a showing for the third day in a row! I put the keys back down. Chip had decided earlier today to roll around in the recently mowed back yard, and he had strewn grass clippings from one end of downstairs to the other. So I grabbed a brush to get the rest of the grass out of his fur and then swept the rest of it up despite all the protests from my body. When all was tidy, Chip and I did the usual visit the park ritual. The temperature outdoors was over 100 degrees, and despite parking in the shade, rolling down the windows to let a good breeze in and drinking plenty of water, I felt like I was gonna pass out when I got back home. All yard work and even making dinner were out of the question. i collapsed in a chair and half-watched the news. I was starting to drift off again when Chip, who was looking through the glass front door, started barking. Two men were approaching the house. I found out that they were there for the showing and were half an hour late! Ack! So I let them in, turned off the tv, put on my shoes, put Chip in the car again and took off for another 30 minutes. Good thing they hadn't caught me cooking dinner, or, worse, in my pjs. I was kinda irrritated that no one had called and told me they were running late so I didn't have to be gone so long. But, hey, I gotta get the house sold, so a certain amount of inconvenience must be endured.

One thing that is of solace is that even though my pain level is climbing once again, it still seems to be slightly less than pre-prednisone. The neuropathy has returned, but the pain/tingling episodes are briefer and not as intense. If these things stay exactly as they are now, I may still be able to deal. I don't have a choice, really. I have to get through the summer one way or the other. I just hope I am not permanently worse for the wear after this house-selling adventure.

I need someone to make an offer, soon.

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