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Here are details about the breast biopsy I had this morning. Most of this is for ed-u-ma-cational purposes. Male readers, you are excused unless you would actually find this interesting.

Went over the procedure with the doc and his assistant beforehand. Found out that the anaesthetic they use contains epinephrine, which I am sensitive to, so they had to arrange for a replacement numbing agent. The advantage was no adrenaline reaction, but the disadvantage was that what they used was much shorter acting.

They were pretty accommodating. I got to lie face up, well, somewhat, anyway, with a pillow under my knees to support my back and another one under my arm that I had to keep propped over my head. I'm grateful I didn't have to do the type where you lie face down with your boob stuck through a hole in the table.

They did an ultrasound to establish the position of the area they wanted to sample. The technician had a hard time finding it because it was so small, but the doc helped her out. I looked at the screen and was amazed they could even tell what they were looking at because I didn't see anything that definable (but I guess that's why I'm not being paid the big bucks to be in medicine, heh heh).

Then I was disinfected and readied for the anaesthetic. I won't lie: I thought those shots hurt like a sonofabitch. But I suspect that for a person without fibromyalgia, they aren't really too bad.

The shots were actually the worst part of the whole thing because I was numb for when they took the core samples. There's an odd sensation of pressure and tugging, but it was tolerable. I don't know how many samples they got because I am squeamish and made a point of not looking.

Then they did something I'd never heard of before: they placed a tiny titanium chip in the area where they had done the biopsy. It's a marker so that on future mammograms, they will know that area has already been biopsied and they can compare it to the original films to make sure nothing has changed. The chip will not affect MRIs or security screenings in airports.

When the sampling was done, the assistant put pressure on the area to stop any bleeding, of which there was very little. She did mention that I began to bruise almost immediately and said that I may notice bruising over other areas since the needle had gone across my breast from the side. She placed a single steri-strip over the incision; usually they use more, but I am sensitive to adhesives, so she kept it simple.

After 10 more minutes or so, I was allowed to sit up. I was a bit dizzy, but that was probably my blood pressure problem rather than anything related to the procedure. Remained sitting while they readied a mammogram machine.

It's weird getting a scan when your boob is numb. On the plus side, no discomfort, but on the downside, it's harder to be cooperative when you can't tell exactly where it is, heh heh. I forgot to ask why they do a scan after the biopsy; I just followed orders.

Normally, before they send you home, they tape a pressure bandage to the biopsy site, but since my skin tends to come off whenever I use adhesives, they mummified me in that self-stick sport wrap that doesn't irritate the skin. I'm delightfully flat now, but no way will that bandage come off. They sent me home with some gel ice packs that I am to use frequently over the next 24 hours.

Good thing I only had to drive partway across town to get home because the anaesthetic was already starting to wear off. Can't take any anti-inflammatories for two more days, so I am popping two extra-strength Tylenol every four hours even though I don't think it makes much difference. The ice actually seems to be more helpful.

Post "op" instructions are: no shower, exercise or removal of bandages for 48 hours. That's it. The doc will be getting the results of the biopsy sometime between tomorrow and Thursday morning.

I am told that most women experience little or no pain with this procedure. How I wish I was most women. My fibromyalgia is not cutting me any slack at the moment.

But what's done is done. No ifs, ands, or boobs about it.