Sunday, February 27, 2011

Rave of the Day for February 27, 2011: 

Believe it or not, I am nearly at the end of my retrieved archives from 2002 and 2003 except for a few that are holiday themed. I do, however, have quite a few that I saved directly from e-mail during the past five years or so and will be raiding those soon. In the meantime, more pup funnies!


* I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

* The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

* I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.

* I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.

* I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.

* I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to throw up.

* I will not throw up in the car.

* I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.

* I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.

* I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.

* I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end.

* I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.

* I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.

* When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside.

* We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

* I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.

* The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps.

* My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

* I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car registration.

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